Why I Love The Inhumanoids

The 1980s were an interesting time for kids animation. All kinds of weird ideas made it onto the air, many of which were a lot stranger than the typical G.I. Joe and Transformers episodes. There was Jayce and the Wheeled Warriors, Sectaurs, Ulysses 31, Robotix, Thundarr the Barbarian . . . I could go on, but for my money, the darkest, most-insane, straight-up violent kids show of that era was the Inhumanoids. This was a cartoon that was named after the bad guys rather than the heroes, and involved giant zombies, monsters eating other monsters, demonic imagery, and characters being thrown into pools of toxic waste. And while it did get cheesey at times, there were moments where my early-elementary-school self wondered if I should really watch animation THAT disturbing.



Fortunately, my parents were never around while it was on. So everything turned out all right.

The protagonists of the Inhumanoids show was a team of explorers/scientists called Earth Core. They were one-dimensional characters who wore suits of armor, yelled at each other, and regularly journeyed down into the earth. But I could never keep their names straight anyway, so enough about them.

It was the Inhumanoids themselves who were the main draw of the cartoon. Each one was a huge, towering beast, roughly the size of the Statue of Liberty. Yet somehow, they all managed to find tunnels and caverns that were tall enough to stand up straight.

And the first one introduced on the show was Tendril. He was a green, slimy, tentacled creature that was clearly inspired by Cthulhu. The guy was never all that bright, but he was good at wrecking things and absorbing punishment. And every time you cut off a piece of him, that piece would grow into yet another Tendril.

Then there was Metlar, the leader of the Inhumanoids and the most powerful. Metlar lived in the volcanic regions beneath the earth, and was loosely designed after the classic devil/demon archetype. His usual attack would be to hack up a molten ball of lava and throw it at his opponent. Looking back at him now, it’s safe to say that he was the most death-metal influenced of the group.

But my personal favorite was a lumbering nightmare called D’Compose. This monster was basically undead, had a dinosaur skull for a head, and could swing open his ribcage to trap victims inside. And whenever D’Compose scratched a human with his claws, that human would quickly mutate into a giant zombie, the same size as D’Compose himself.

Let me just state once more that this was taking place on a Saturday morning cartoon show.



Alas, I don’t think we’re ever likely to see an American animated series like the Inhumanoids ever again. The day-time censors are stricter now, broadcasting companies don’t want to take as many chances, and mind-altering drugs are a bit harder to come by.

But the first series of the Inhumanoids are, for the moment, on you-tube clips, and the complete DVD set can be located online . . . if you look hard enough. So go on, get yourself a copy, and show it to your kids. It might also require some cash for a child psychologist, but what the heck. It’s all in the name of entertainment.

- Nate